This made me tear up. I got married earlier this year, after going through very similar struggles with myself - I don't fit the neatly shaped gender hole that's carved out for me in a traditional wedding ceremony, I'm entirely unlovable, almost everyone I knew had parents who were either divorced or bitterly unhappy in their marriages so what kind of template did I have? Turns out we didn't need a template or a rulebook, or anything that wasn't exactly what we wanted to make our wedding and marriage our own.
"I may be weird and not conventionally attractive, but look! This man claims me! I'm not a total failure!" Rude of you to come for me in my own inbox. 😅
Cishet marriage gave me a path to acceptance and a place in society, and it was great until it wasn't. Now I'm finally realizing what a bad fit it is, but at the same time being gentle with myself for the choices I made when I didn't know how to listen to myself. And being thankful that I live in a time and place where I can get divorced and have a chance at a different kind of life.
This made me tear up. I got married earlier this year, after going through very similar struggles with myself - I don't fit the neatly shaped gender hole that's carved out for me in a traditional wedding ceremony, I'm entirely unlovable, almost everyone I knew had parents who were either divorced or bitterly unhappy in their marriages so what kind of template did I have? Turns out we didn't need a template or a rulebook, or anything that wasn't exactly what we wanted to make our wedding and marriage our own.
"I may be weird and not conventionally attractive, but look! This man claims me! I'm not a total failure!" Rude of you to come for me in my own inbox. 😅
Cishet marriage gave me a path to acceptance and a place in society, and it was great until it wasn't. Now I'm finally realizing what a bad fit it is, but at the same time being gentle with myself for the choices I made when I didn't know how to listen to myself. And being thankful that I live in a time and place where I can get divorced and have a chance at a different kind of life.
Thank you for this ❤️