thank you for sharing all your words and experiences.
thank you for sharing some of what is yours privately here publicly.
so glad you can get a glimmer of a world where you revel in the friction and feel complete!
PS fun bonus wordplay if you like that sort of thing...
sometimes people are looking for a be-all-end-all to understand someone's identity, when life itself is fluid and ever-shifting. some people might want some kind of conclusion, a "big ender." when in fact, sometimes the answer is "bigender."
I love hearing about the way you experience your gender. It's so inspiring. From the outside my hair is long and I look like a woman therefore it "must be", but I really wish I could just be a person. All the projections and assumptions forced onto us as some binary identity we never chose is so exhausting. I don't know if I'll ever get over how obvious the indoctrination of the gender binary is. It's so sad. I wish I could escape it. I wish everyone could. Thank you for being you!
Friction is such a good way to describe it. There are parts in motion here. I recently saw a comic by a non-binary person on T but who didn’t identify as transmasc talking about something similar so this has really been on the brain. When I was in this HR training (this training was just so amusing from start to finish, like liberal university administration at its finest) they had my legal name on my nametag. It’s Brittany and I’m not out as he/they at work save for a few people, just they and I go by Britt specifically because it’s hits more masc with 2 Ts. They made us go around in a circle and say our name and pronouns obviously. I’m the only one with any gender bs (like except for the woman who went a couple after me who felt the need to clarify she didn’t do any of that gender nonsense and then identified her pronouns as me myself and I ‘just to be different’). They then told us to add our pronouns to our tags so I crossed out the ‘any’ put he/they with Bonus Points for Benji and the next session they gave me a new one that just had Benji!! No!! Not what I said? There’s literally another person from my office here that doesn’t know and they’re like politely not bringing it up but they are also hella confused.
They were there together for a reason. That’s the sauce that makes it tasty!!! Assigned Benji at New People Manager Training omg. And I kept insisting whatever came out was fine but they still felt nervous to say anything. They’d drop down to a whisper to say Benji and apologize when they said Britt. Reliably, even when they see me on campus.
They really had me going bc work is so crazy it was ridiculous to be sequestered to begin with; I wanted to run circles around I just wanted to be the worst little gender gremlin they have ever experienced I was about to be Bad Representation™️ for the community. Don’t know where I got the strength lol
And I totally get when binary trans people want nothing to do with it. And also would much rather get zeroed in on the masc side and they’re trying to be respectful. It’s just kind of it’s own brand of transphobia when people like can’t address that you’re trans. Like they don’t wanna talk about it at all if ur nonbinary, assuming they don’t pidgeonhole you into man-lite or woman-lite (all useful and fun benefits locked behind paywall), it feels like they think I don’t want to be reminded.
I was born in the briar patch though; I love being here. It’s like the ultimate inside joke, it makes everything I say and do funnier. It’s the gift that keeps on giving (even if that same struggle also yields unbearable pain; they exist as part of the same balance and isn’t it sacred to have felt anything at all?).
There’s so much exploring to do and there’s adventure and excitement in that. Where’s the distinction, the overlap, what does it mean to me? Butch or trans? Is it the absence of gender or the presence of something more? Is it something else entirely? What do these patterns mean to others? What does the meaning others take mean to me? Should it carry any weight at all? Do we have a choice in that weight? Much to consider
As usual Ur relevancy streak remains unbroken king
My younger child is nonbinary and reading your comics is really helpful to me to better understand what some of my child's experiences may be, and the teen they are growing into.
Wow. Yes. Thank you for putting that to words. That’s exactly the feeling between my femme-presenting persona and the completeness of my experience . 🙌🏻 as always, thank you for sharing.
I don’t really have anyone in my life that gets me and my gender identity anymore. It’s been pretty isolating and frustrating. Reading your comics helps me to feel seen. Thank you.
ND!
beautiful.
thank you for sharing all your words and experiences.
thank you for sharing some of what is yours privately here publicly.
so glad you can get a glimmer of a world where you revel in the friction and feel complete!
PS fun bonus wordplay if you like that sort of thing...
sometimes people are looking for a be-all-end-all to understand someone's identity, when life itself is fluid and ever-shifting. some people might want some kind of conclusion, a "big ender." when in fact, sometimes the answer is "bigender."
thanks again for sharing all that you do!
I’m non-binary and I love this comic/illustration. Thank you for sharing your gender expansive story with the world through art, it’s wonderful. 🥰
I love hearing about the way you experience your gender. It's so inspiring. From the outside my hair is long and I look like a woman therefore it "must be", but I really wish I could just be a person. All the projections and assumptions forced onto us as some binary identity we never chose is so exhausting. I don't know if I'll ever get over how obvious the indoctrination of the gender binary is. It's so sad. I wish I could escape it. I wish everyone could. Thank you for being you!
Friction is such a good way to describe it. There are parts in motion here. I recently saw a comic by a non-binary person on T but who didn’t identify as transmasc talking about something similar so this has really been on the brain. When I was in this HR training (this training was just so amusing from start to finish, like liberal university administration at its finest) they had my legal name on my nametag. It’s Brittany and I’m not out as he/they at work save for a few people, just they and I go by Britt specifically because it’s hits more masc with 2 Ts. They made us go around in a circle and say our name and pronouns obviously. I’m the only one with any gender bs (like except for the woman who went a couple after me who felt the need to clarify she didn’t do any of that gender nonsense and then identified her pronouns as me myself and I ‘just to be different’). They then told us to add our pronouns to our tags so I crossed out the ‘any’ put he/they with Bonus Points for Benji and the next session they gave me a new one that just had Benji!! No!! Not what I said? There’s literally another person from my office here that doesn’t know and they’re like politely not bringing it up but they are also hella confused.
They were there together for a reason. That’s the sauce that makes it tasty!!! Assigned Benji at New People Manager Training omg. And I kept insisting whatever came out was fine but they still felt nervous to say anything. They’d drop down to a whisper to say Benji and apologize when they said Britt. Reliably, even when they see me on campus.
They really had me going bc work is so crazy it was ridiculous to be sequestered to begin with; I wanted to run circles around I just wanted to be the worst little gender gremlin they have ever experienced I was about to be Bad Representation™️ for the community. Don’t know where I got the strength lol
And I totally get when binary trans people want nothing to do with it. And also would much rather get zeroed in on the masc side and they’re trying to be respectful. It’s just kind of it’s own brand of transphobia when people like can’t address that you’re trans. Like they don’t wanna talk about it at all if ur nonbinary, assuming they don’t pidgeonhole you into man-lite or woman-lite (all useful and fun benefits locked behind paywall), it feels like they think I don’t want to be reminded.
I was born in the briar patch though; I love being here. It’s like the ultimate inside joke, it makes everything I say and do funnier. It’s the gift that keeps on giving (even if that same struggle also yields unbearable pain; they exist as part of the same balance and isn’t it sacred to have felt anything at all?).
There’s so much exploring to do and there’s adventure and excitement in that. Where’s the distinction, the overlap, what does it mean to me? Butch or trans? Is it the absence of gender or the presence of something more? Is it something else entirely? What do these patterns mean to others? What does the meaning others take mean to me? Should it carry any weight at all? Do we have a choice in that weight? Much to consider
As usual Ur relevancy streak remains unbroken king
My younger child is nonbinary and reading your comics is really helpful to me to better understand what some of my child's experiences may be, and the teen they are growing into.
Wow. Yes. Thank you for putting that to words. That’s exactly the feeling between my femme-presenting persona and the completeness of my experience . 🙌🏻 as always, thank you for sharing.
Nate, thank you for sharing your self with us - your words, thoughts, and experiences.
I'm glad you found peace with yourself on this.
Nimona really does, in retrospect, feel like a confession of the soul.
Social concepts force realities on us. Yet we're their masters, and we can bring truth and change.
It takes time, and that's frustrating.
As a transmasc but definitely gender-fluid person this one makes me cry every time, from feeling seen
I'm very happy for you ND!
I personally hope you find being female most comfortable. I was on the gel for a while and my GOD it was horrible.
Beautiful art of yourself. Thank you.
I don’t really have anyone in my life that gets me and my gender identity anymore. It’s been pretty isolating and frustrating. Reading your comics helps me to feel seen. Thank you.
I sat in the train silently crying. Thank you.
Beautiful 🙏